A MUST READ!
Marriage is meant to be a life-long commitment, so it deserves every
bit of special attention when preparing yourself for it. Before taking
this step towards a happy life with someone else, you want to make sure
you have a happy life as an individual. Marriage isn’t only about having
a man who will take care of you; it’s also about you being ready,
willing, and able to take care of him.
These 20 steps will serve as an
excellent guide for preparing yourself for a happy, healthy
relationship, and help you work towards a marriage.
Step 1:
Self-evaluation- (i.e. How do you feel about the person you are inside
and out?) You have to love yourself before you love someone else.
Step 2:
Presentation- Always present yourself as the person you want to be
known and remembered as. Men are visual and will evaluate you 1st based
on your appearance and also by the way you carry yourself.
Step 3:
The Introduction- Remember you’re a lady! Maintain control! Just give a
guy you’re interested in “the look” & he will come right over &
initiate convo. This will show your submissive side, while allowing him
to take the lead.
Step 4:
Friendship- There will be plenty of time for sex, but if you want a
future with this man, 1st get to know him and find out if you even like the guy. Friendship is the key to romance!
Step 5: Dating- Focus on the man who focuses on you, but in the meantime, keep your options open. Date multiple people at once.
Step 6: Sex- Friendship doesn’t come with benefits. Benefits come with a commitment. If he wants sex, your relationship has to be exclusive. Know your worth!
Step 7:
Commitment- You’ve been dating this guy for a while, the chemistry is
great, and you’ve established a great friendship, and you’re ready to
take the next step. Go ahead and make it official! Let him ask to be exclusive with you.
Step 8:
Incorporate The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Relationships (according
to Chey B.) Those habits are: Respect, Love, Trust, Support, Loyalty,
Honesty & Communication.
Step 9:
Consistency- Everything you brought to the table in the beginning
should not only remain, but it should get better. Never stop competing
for your partner’s love and affection.
Step 10:
Share your world! Introduce your partner to any/everyone who is
important in your life. This shows him that you want him to be a part of
it. Even a man wants to feel special.
Step 11:
Space- Allow each other just enough room to breathe, but not enough
room to leave. Give yourselves the opportunity to miss one another.
Step 12:
Growth- If you want to grow as a couple, it’s important that you do
things “as a couple”. Not all the time, but most of the time.
Step 13:
Secrets- If you can’t be open and honest with your partner, you are not
ready for a relationship. Stay single until you’re ready to be
vulnerable. Being in a relationship means that you’re a team! Keep
secrets with your partner, not from your partner.
Step 14: Male friends- Platonic friendship is an oxymoron! All men have a motive! Friendship is the key
to romance and men use this approach to get close to a woman’s heart,
mind, and body! Your partner should be your one and only male friend!
Keep the peace in your relationship by dismissing them all!
Step 15: Single friends- You’re in a relationship now! From time to time, your single friends will invite you out to share their world, but instead, invite them in to come and share yours
instead. Use this as an opportunity to show your single friends the
value in being in a committed relationship while also strengthening
yours.
Step 16:
Engagement- Don’t waste countless years of your life hoping, wishing,
and praying for a marriage proposal. A man knows from the very beginning
whether he wants to marry you or not. Expect a proposal no later than
year two or three.
Step 17:
Wedding Plans- Communicate with your partner, set a time-line for the
activities leading up to the wedding, as well as a tentative wedding
date, work together and find a way to include both parties’ family and
friends to help assist. Start planning the wedding within weeks after
the engagement.
Step 18:
Getting Married- After 2-3 years of following the rules of
relationships, you’re certain that you want to spend the rest of your
life with this man. Go for it! You are about to become an official team;
you are one! Let no one and nothing come between you two. You
marriage should be impenetrable and inseparable! Always protect and
value this union!
Step 19: Moving in- You’re about to find out new things about your husband. Don’t be alarmed; simply observe, take notes, and prepare to make any necessary adjustments.
Step 20:
Relationship Turmoil- Remember all the steps you took to get to where
you are, and know that your marriage is worth fighting for. Never stop
loving one another. Marriage is forever!
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